I love dysfunctional family dramas! Or as I like to call them Dysfunctional family dramas. I don't know if its because of the fact that it is the only genre that can feature interesting lead female characters with out being derided as a "Chick Flick." Or maybe I'm just an emotional sadist." The Squid and the Whale", "Margot at the Wedding", "Little Miss Sunshine", " Rachel Getting Married", "Smart People" just a few of my favorite dysfunctional family dramas."Ah family dramas! Nothing more entertaining then watching the antics of a family so screwed up that it makes your family look like like something out of an advertisement for Disney world!Or Sweaters! Here are some recommendations you can use if you ever find yourself trapped inside a family drama!
tip 1- Only answer yes or no questions. Everything you say WILL be used against you.
tip 2- Utilize passive aggressive behavior. That way you can subtly annoy all your family members without having to get punched in the face.
tip 3- Reject every invitation. As we can see in films like "The Family Stone" (which unlike most family dramas focuses not on an insane family but on a family that makes everyone else insane.) and "Who's Afraid Of Virgina Woolf" ( which is about an insane couple as opposed to an insane family) any one who visits anyone in the context of a family drama will face dire consequences! Just ask Nick and Honey from "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf'" They politely agree to go to a friend house for tea and the husband ends up having sex with the 50 year old hostess while his wife spends the entire night lying on the bathroom floor with a whisky bottle in her arms. OR you could ask This girl who goes to meet her fiance's family in "The Family Stone" Meredith:
arrives in the family drama engaged to this guy:
and leaves engaged to this guy:
( sorry Luke Wilson i you're reading this, its the character not you! It was the only bad picture I could find.)
While this guy:
Winds up with this girl:
Who also happens to be Meredith's @$%&^% SISTER!
tip 3- Pray for sunshine. The family in "Little Miss Sunshine" is perhaps the nicest family ever to star in a family drama. THE mother is a saint, the father is obsessed with success, the son has refused to speak for months, the grandpa is an obscenity spewing smack head and the daughter is perhaps the nicest and best behaved little kid ever! In short this family is absolutely adorable! Sure they have issues but lets face it they are a whole lot nicer then any families you or I know! JUMP ON THE VOLKSWAGEN!
tip 4- Be as mean as possible to everyone. Lie, cheat, steal, kill whatever it take to make your family despise you. Be advised that while this method may take patience because as this is a family drama your family will try multiple times to bring you back to their embrace. Do NOT LET THEM! This is the only true way to escape a family drama. Take a cue from Beth in "Ordinary People."Wile her son is in a nut house she decides that it is a lovely time to go traveling. She consistently treats her family with the worst kind of passive aggressive silence, particularly her son. Eventually she alienates herself from the family so much that they do nothing to stop her from abandoning them and she is able to spend the rest of her life traveling and forgetting her family ever existed! Or look at "Margot at the Wedding." Margot deliberately destroys her less successful sister's wedding by bringing her sister's fiance's past minor infidelities to light. Eventually her sister demands that she leaves and it appears that Margot and her sister probably will never speak again. Which means the end of the family drama!
If you follow these rules you should have no trouble escaping your family Drama. If not well......
..........There is always Prozac.
tip 1- Only answer yes or no questions. Everything you say WILL be used against you.
tip 2- Utilize passive aggressive behavior. That way you can subtly annoy all your family members without having to get punched in the face.
tip 3- Reject every invitation. As we can see in films like "The Family Stone" (which unlike most family dramas focuses not on an insane family but on a family that makes everyone else insane.) and "Who's Afraid Of Virgina Woolf" ( which is about an insane couple as opposed to an insane family) any one who visits anyone in the context of a family drama will face dire consequences! Just ask Nick and Honey from "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf'" They politely agree to go to a friend house for tea and the husband ends up having sex with the 50 year old hostess while his wife spends the entire night lying on the bathroom floor with a whisky bottle in her arms. OR you could ask This girl who goes to meet her fiance's family in "The Family Stone" Meredith:
arrives in the family drama engaged to this guy:
and leaves engaged to this guy:
( sorry Luke Wilson i you're reading this, its the character not you! It was the only bad picture I could find.)While this guy:
Winds up with this girl:
Who also happens to be Meredith's @$%&^% SISTER!
tip 3- Pray for sunshine. The family in "Little Miss Sunshine" is perhaps the nicest family ever to star in a family drama. THE mother is a saint, the father is obsessed with success, the son has refused to speak for months, the grandpa is an obscenity spewing smack head and the daughter is perhaps the nicest and best behaved little kid ever! In short this family is absolutely adorable! Sure they have issues but lets face it they are a whole lot nicer then any families you or I know! JUMP ON THE VOLKSWAGEN!
tip 4- Be as mean as possible to everyone. Lie, cheat, steal, kill whatever it take to make your family despise you. Be advised that while this method may take patience because as this is a family drama your family will try multiple times to bring you back to their embrace. Do NOT LET THEM! This is the only true way to escape a family drama. Take a cue from Beth in "Ordinary People."Wile her son is in a nut house she decides that it is a lovely time to go traveling. She consistently treats her family with the worst kind of passive aggressive silence, particularly her son. Eventually she alienates herself from the family so much that they do nothing to stop her from abandoning them and she is able to spend the rest of her life traveling and forgetting her family ever existed! Or look at "Margot at the Wedding." Margot deliberately destroys her less successful sister's wedding by bringing her sister's fiance's past minor infidelities to light. Eventually her sister demands that she leaves and it appears that Margot and her sister probably will never speak again. Which means the end of the family drama!
If you follow these rules you should have no trouble escaping your family Drama. If not well......
..........There is always Prozac.
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